Starting my Journey

I am a 23 year old female with a severe profound hearing loss in both ears. I was born with a hearing loss however I was not identified until I was three years old. I started wearing hearing aids at three years of age and I have worn them ever since. It has been 20 years now. My hearing loss started becoming progressive in 2000, and since then has deteriorated quickly. I struggle every day to hear anything whether it is my husband or my mom, or the students I teach.I have known for years that I would probably have to go the route of a cochlear implant at some point, but now that it is here I am terrified. I don't know why I am scared....the thought of hearing better, the thought of giving up my ear permanently.

I know I should not be scared because a CI will end many of my battles with hearing. One of my primary battles takes place everyday at my job. I am a teacher of the Deaf and Hard of Hearing in a small rural community. I have three students and they all hear better than me (2 CIs, 1 HA). On a daily basis I will think they said something they didn't or that they left off an important speech marker such as plural s and almost every time they have to tell me what they said a second or third time sometimes. These are just the struggles at work. Not to mention my struggles with family, and graduate school. My graduate classes can be a nightmare sometimes depending on the number of people and style of classroom and not to mention the professor. So one would think that after fighting all of these battles on a daily basis that I would be ready to give up one ear for a CI...I would think so to, but I am still terrified.

However, I am tired at the end of the day and I know within me that a CI would make my life better so I am going to take the first step this morning and call the University of NC and schedule my initial evaluation. We will see what happens from there.

Lauren